Long Day, Long Entry (5,042 free characters Floralilia!)

Mornin ... How’s everyone? We’re doing pretty good. :) We had a regular night’s sleep and that seems all good! Plus, coffee is almost ready. Hmm, maybe I should fill my water pitcher while in there. Yep, yep ... that seems like a good idea. Hold on, please. Now, follow that up with some granola and we’re all set to go!

I see I have plenty of time to write today ... might be a long one, unless someone cries out, "Uncle."

Not sure where to start ... only two events on the docket yesterday, really. I went to work and we saw Dr. M. Pretty simple so far. Maybe I’ll think through from start to finish and see what comes up.

Let’s see ... hmm, did we lose a day? I wonder if we forgot to post yesterday’s work before erasing the WordPerfect document. I’m not sure about this part. Trying to collect now a thought of what we did yesterday morning. It seems as if we were up doing something. *Sigh* Let it go. Maybe we did something else?

Well, there was the drive to work. That was pretty uneventful, except the part where we saw the Miller Lite truck. Not sure if we mentioned that before. We figure if we see that truck on our morning trip to work, we are going to have good luck all day :) Usually, we’re not superstitious, but it doesn’t hurt to have one or two imperfections laying about...

I don’t know what we thought about on the way to work. We figure those thoughts are usually pretty fleeting. I can’t say as to whether or not we were thinking about work, because quite honestly, beside knowing we were going to have a staffing, for the life of me, I couldn’t remember exactly what we did for work. Wasn’t even sure how to put together a staffing. Yep, yep ... nice break, and maybe because of that, we still felt relaxed. Most likely we thought nothing more than the immediate car in front of us. Oh yeah, and traffic was kind of smooth!

I think we hesitated for only a moment before putting out the last smoke after we’d gotten there. One of our clients is the door opener and has a habit of gushing welcomes. Hehe ... It was a nice greeting, but we’d more hoped to slide right in sneakily. Takes a second to warm up. But, before we got to our mail box in the secretaries office next to Sr’s office, we were greeted with five more hello’s and welcome backs. I guess that kind of thing settles into your heart some how. I think I’d miss going to work if people didn’t take notice of us for just being there.

The mailbox was very full, but we were feeling light-hearted. Sr. Tess was just around the corner by her side desk and computer. I think she was glad to see us too, but perhaps a little cautious/worried. We’d sent her an email the day before telling her about the 10 am staffing (annual meeting for one of the clients) and that we’d leave after that for a noon doctor meeting, then hopefully come back. She had known we weren’t prepared for the meeting yet, so excused us with an "we’ll talk later." Felt some relief there.

It was a wonderful feeling walking back into our office. We took a minute or two to just look around, because we’d forgotten what that was all about too. It was like spotting one object after another and thinking, "Oh yeah, oh yeah ... I remember now." We paused on things to bring up recall of them to jar our memory. Like, I saw again the blue dolphins that one of my sons had gotten from a trip and I thought I sure do like those dolphins. I noted my stuff bears in the cubby hole were placed slightly differently and thought, hmm, Margarita must have cleaned in here while we were gone. She even dusts! I noted the brief case sitting on one of the guest chairs and thinking, hmm, I wonder what’s in there? Maybe she should have come home with me? Nah. She’s fine where she is at!

We also took note of where things were on the desks. The computer desk looked pretty clear, but there was a side stack gathering over on top of the second computer (sits on our writing desk). Thought, hmm, that looks like trouble. Also, the secretary had "dared" to drop a whole bunch of folders on our desk for staff training. Thought, hmm better get them off. We’re going to need that space. So, I sat the 8-10 inches of folders next to the briefcase. Figured we better keep one guest chair open :). We set down our lunch, coffee cup, keys and mail and turned on the small desk light.

It wasn’t until later that day when it got dark and rainy that we realized we had never bothered to turn on the main light. I think we do that pretty unconsciously so that nobody figures we’re home. :) We did open the blinds on our long set of windows. And, sure to form ... we were greeted by one of the clients. He sees us coming, uses a side door out onto the smaller courtyard and startles us by knocking on our window with a big smile and wave. This never fails to startle me. Feels like we’re in a fish bowl and someone is knocking on the glass!

We’d sat down in our chair. Man, did that feel sweet. It swivels and slides back and forth between the two desks. By this time ... we were feeling a bit of the fish out of water. Had needs to get back to the computer and AOL proper, but just to check in though. I knew we were going to have to figure out the staffing situation. It was going to be a very quick effort to put things together. I’d gotten to work at 7:30, so just had 2 ½ hours before the meeting. I started the hard process of rebooting my memory.

First thought was that, we’re going to need an agenda. Took a second to remember that I kept copies of all the meetings’ agendas somewhere on our computer. So, we figured out all that. Difficulty was pretty high. Fortunately, there was a block of them, so they caught my attention. I really have had a terrible year for computer files. The titles are ok, but they are pretty much just dumped into a couple of big files. Thought to ourselves. Hmm, it is time we start up a new file for the year 2004-2005, but we’re going to keep it organized this year. Are you starting to see some slight pattern starting already, in that no thought was very direct? We were kind of like all over the place.

It took us a couple of efforts before we found one of the newer agendas then we had to figure out what the day was so I could date it. We had to read the line items of a general meeting one at a time before we could understand it. Seemed like this was going to cause some trouble. But, we knew we were on economy speed and would have to really cut down to the basics. We thought, hmm, some kind of report needs to be done. Then we thought of the new standards and that an outside agency would now be represented at the meetings. Thought ... we’re going to have to do this a little more official. Better not do that report until we’ve talked to everyone. Unfortunately, not the client though. She is unable to communicate in words. And, just nods her head yes to any question or statement put in front of her.

We then thought of the Personal Preference Interview we send out to the parents. Figured that clue me into their general wishes for the next year’s goals. Thought, hmm, better take a look at that mail. We’d skimmed it when we first sat down and I hadn’t recalled this client’s envelope coming back with the survey. It’s a long one ... 15 pages. Thought, eh ... this mother wouldn’t have bothered to see the direction that said send it in before the meeting. She’s pretty possessive. Thought, hmm ... wonder if the Direct Support Person (DSP) is in yet. ‘Bout that time. Sure enough ... she was just coming in the door. She was standing there talking to another DSP sitting by the door. We waited patiently for their conversation to stop, then we put our arm around her stating that she was our new best friend :)

Hehe - then of course, we reminded her of the importance of the day toward staffing. She looked a little panicked as I knew she would be. She’s behind in her work too. So, we made gestures to her that we were going to take this calmly. I did have to ask what had been done and hadn’t been done and what she could give me orally. We’d walked together the long length of the hall and were back in our office by then. She sat down resolutely. I thought, how nice. She’s feeling much more comfortable with us and our office than she once had been. I think staff sometimes gets a little intimidated by us, because they don’t know how we can think of the stuff we do. It’s taken a long time for them to trust that we weren’t going to "hurt them."

We talked for a half hour straight and in the process we took notes of old goals and new goals. We usually choose three goals. For this client, we let go of the goals from the year previous. One was very ineffective by now, and the other too never got past 34% and 43% completed. What was decided was to offer one goal in regard to a cashier/change program the client had found with a great deal of interest, one goal to do with the community, in that for being so low key ... this client seemed to sparkle when taken out on trips, even if only the dollar store or library. And then, the last goal would be tied to athletics. She had put on 60 pounds over the last 5-6 years and was just starting to come out of her shell by being involved in ball games. The staff had said out of her 9 people this shy and unassuming woman was by now the 4th best shot in basketball! We figured that seemed pretty good. By our areas, we’d covered the domains of achievement, community, and personal. Good, good.

The next 75 minutes were spent in review of goals from the previous year. We like to write up a summary of all that was done and how the client had progressed through her work. I wasn’t caught up on monthly reports, but from the majority that had been done and the DSP having given me her disk on weekly reports, we were able to summarize pretty SUCCINCTLY. Hehe. We can do a year in two pages :) We use a lot of commas in a list format. We also did a pretty quick ICAP which is an assessment of adaptive and maladaptive behavior. We finished in such good time, we were able to pull forms that needed to be signed and do copies with 5 minutes to spare for a smoke.

Hehe - eh, almost. We ran in to another client’s father who was busting in the seams. His daughter has profound retardation, but figured out instantaneously how to walk on an exercise tread mill! This was really, really great news especially due to her current size. But, mostly amazing, because her mind adapted soooo quickly! And, she seemed to love it! He said, that he didn’t want to push her so had only done 3-4 minutes, but he tested her on two speeds. He said also, that she was smiling as she looked down at her feet and had started to laugh. Pretty good for a person not capable of speaking and needed to be told to stand up or sit down!! We also told him that she’d watched the rest of the group running an obstacle course and when the DSP gave her a chance, she ran the course as well! He was a very proud father!

Alas, the parents were on time for the staffing although the other agency was a no show. It ran pretty smoothly even with the fact that this mother tends to talk on and on about things that are not relevant. We were pretty efficient at keeping to the agenda. We felt bad that Sr. had taken the DSP down for not talking more of her program, but the DSP came back on two feet. :) Everything else went according to general schedule. For our part, I was just so relieved that after we had started the project that it had all come back to us.

After that, we had to go to our other meeting with the doctor, but at least we’d survived the first half of the day.

You all know us by now, in that, it is hard for us to recall much of the meetings with Dr. M. Hard to access the thinking of other parts. Much easier to describe the behavior and a few of the things we heard. Pretty much only two parts were out. Anniemi and Casey. Casey only had the last 10 minutes or so. During the rest of the time Anniemie did the best she could in dealing with the direct issues of anger with Dr. M the week before. What happened with her is kind of weird though. Well, many of our parts can’t look directly at Dr. M. It has to do with being trained as a child to never, never look my mother directly in the face. We were taught to lower our head and eyes in a slave like fashion. Anniemi was no exception. Her voice was low and she seemed to wait long periods of time before talking and would only answer direct questions. She wouldn’t respond to statements that inferred that she continue talking on her own.

The weird part is ... whatever he was asking her, she seemed to have an explanation. I’m not saying that all her thoughts were right ... many of the thought processes actually seemed to be only distantly correct, in that, although we’ve known Dr. M. for five years, she couldn’t separate her distrust from the mother from how she was now responding to Dr. M. But, even at this ... she seemed to be conscious of these thoughts and able to verbalize things such as she was seeing two pictures at the same time. She didn’t seem able to trust either. Pretty much ... shoot trying to think here. She ... the main point of contention seemed to revolve around lack of communication that Dr. M. had unintentionally put out the week before and having been closed off from communication from the grandfather and the mother. Seems there was a pretty big divide in not being allowed a direct "casual" conversation with either of them.

Now, it is hitting me like this might seem pretty strange. Things said, like "hi, how are you?" or "how was your day?" Were never asked. The best or closest we had was a list of chores to follow or the random beatings for not having completed a task. No one said, "Can I help you with ..." or "Have a good night’s sleep." Just wasn’t done. Hmm, stepping away from this now ... it’s hurting my head to think this hard. Just one last thought. We thought Anniemi was presenting herself as a rock. She wouldn’t allow movement or show any type of emotion. Well two thoughts. Between now and Thursday, we have to look at the situation and figure out how closely Anniemi seems to Annemarie. I’m not sure if there wasn’t some kind of blending of parts.

As far as Casey ... I think pretty much she needed reassurances that things were going to be ok. I don’t know if he really thought of it or not, but there was one thing Dr. M. said that seems to make all the night and day difference. He told her in someway that we all have a sense of that it was going to be ok. For that, we are sincerely grateful.

By then (after an hour), it was back to work.

Right as we’d pulled up to the Center, our friend was pulling up as well. We only talked a second before entering the building. He went down to his office and we headed in toward Sr. Tess’ office. We knew after these other two events were done, she’d want to quickly catch us up. I think she gave 3-4 projects that needed immediate attention. We went over the status of intake with her, staff training, state funding, and staff hiring. She said after this 20-30 minutes was over that she’d wait on some of the other things, until I’d taken care of some of these issues. I remember just listening and commenting, but thinking hmm, this is an interesting business. She seemed to think I could understand everything that she was saying. And, I guess at the time we were. Just its not sticking in our head at this point that all that is important although intellectually I know it is. Just don’t feel real "into" work yet.

We did leave her office and figure out we had some work to do. But, that took us a little while getting back into it. We found our way back to our office and couldn’t help but notice how much paperwork was all over the writing desk. So, we started to sort and organize. There was a nice thing that happened though. Margarita found a few free moments to come say hi, and welcome back. This is always a nice thing. She’d asked how we were, but pretty much needed to talk over things that had been going on with her on-the-job clients. One actually had rode the bus by himself for the first time! He’s in his young 40's. I guess he had trouble pulling the cord at the right time, but I know plenty of adults without DD who would have the same difficulty. *Silly Grin*

Through Margarita we also get a sense of what’s going on "underneath" the agencies floor. Like by now I pretty much had a grasp that one of the DSPs (The highest Group) was leaving. I figured, "Eh, we could do better!" This staff had been the last one on board and had trouble aligning herself to other people’s thinking, plus, she treated the clients as if they were second priority to what was going on in her mind. She would say things like, "I’m having a bad day, so don’t be bothering me" It’s going to mean a whole lot of staff training though. We’ll have to put in 80 hours of on-the-job training with TWO new people. Yeeks!

It also occurred to us that while Margarita was in our office talking, that we’d not had lunch although it was already past 2 pm. So, we opened our drawer found our peanut butter and "chowed down." :) Hmm, we must have gotten some personal talk in too, because I remember showing Margarita the couches that we’d just bought. Hehe AND, we made plenty sure to thank her for the work she’d donein our office. And, then of course, we had to be lectured for leaving our coffee cup dirty. Eh, it all balances out... More than anyone else, we let Margarita take care of us a little. :)

After she left, we went back to work and stayed working 5 hours. We left about a 7:30 pm (twelve hours later). We spent about a half hour talking to Sister Janice on the way out past the copy machine. She was pretty wound up. She talked about things that she was trying to attend to at her Center while staying as company for Sr. Tess. Remember, this is the nun we’d had so much fun with the week before while Sr. was out. She is the one who we giggled at for having caught running down the hall. We’re pretty sure, she’s older than 50! Those nuns!!

We attended to a few projects like clearing the desk, organizing the next task to do on the annual just completed and preparing for the next one. We went through all the intake folders and updated them for Sr. directly, and secondarily for the secretary to retype. We’d pulled out chapters we were going to need retyped for the new CARF book Sr. Tess is borrowing from Sr. Janice, and we made a couple of calls. Seems to me ... we did something else too ... hmm ... I think we did some more work on getting our book order ready to place. Yes, maybe that is it. Shoot, something else too ... a little more directly orientated to work and all those piles on our desk. Perhaps it will come to us on the way to work or after we get there. Eh, can’t be too important.

Guess that’s pretty much of our day. We did stop for a sandwich and some chilli on the way home. Maybe we shouldn’t have, but it was a pretty tense drive home. Somewhere in all that ... it had started to rain pretty hard. It’s one thing where you don’t feel comfortable driving any faster than 50 on the expressway, but the real hard part is going under the viaducts. There were two really bad ones that were flooding over before we left Chicago proper. But, you see other cars ahead of you going through and think, eh, I can make it. We’re pretty sure the water was very high. When you go through it, you see the waves hitting the car and the splatter up higher than the roof and you wonder what you would do if suddenly your car were to stop, because you know your car would be flooded if you had to open your door.

*Sigh* And then you are home, stretching out on the bed ... and none of anything else seems to have mattered! Then you awake, write a little, and its ..Already time for the next day ... So, with that, I guess we should be getting on with things :) Have a nice one too, you here?!

Feelin pretty good for saving 20% of our available space :)  Sure do like to write!