Talking about a Perfect Son

 

Good morning.  Just me.  It’s still early in the morning and I wanted to just write because it makes me happy.  So nothing really special going on here, except I had a very, very nice day yesterday.

 

Most important was that I had a chance to see Jacob.  What a sight for sorry eyes he was.  A blessing to this Earth!  He’s just so wonderful!

 

We met at 11 ... right on time.  I usually pull up to his school apartment (Like an overgrown dorm) and park.  Then I go to the lobby and pull up the first available chair.  Usually, because I get there a few minutes early, I am sitting at the chair at 5 minutes to the hour.  The elevator door might open a few times, but I know he is usually right on time too!  It never fails.  I sit in that chair and my son appears!

 

This time we didn’t go up to his room before or after, BUT he had brought down a paper for me to go over AND he said that his roommate was coming down in a few moments to meet me.  WoW!!!  That made feel pretty important.  At this point, I’d heard not much about him, except Jacob was getting along and the initial announcement that he was gay.  I thought Wonderful!  Good experience for my straight-laced son. 

 

I guess whatever initial thoughts were, by this time about a month and a half into school, they are getting along wonderfully.  Though I’ve learned that being a roommate actually only means sharing a common area that includes storage area and bathroom.  Each of them actually has their own room past the common area.  Pretty cool.  The room is big enough and along the outside wall is a large set of windows from one wall to another.  Jacob and James are on the 5th floor this year.  I was perfectly delighted with this young man from the start!  He has the ambition of being a doctorate in psychology, most likely he will go on to clinical.  WoW, you might imagine how exciting that is for me.  I’m like pretty much pro-psychologists at this point!

 

He would have come out to dinner with us, except he had a previous obligation to go home and do something with his dog. *Sigh* I felt a little bad about that, because Jacob said the roommate goes home almost every weekend, and I imagined that might leave Jacob feeling a little lonely.  No mother likes to hear that.  But, the thing is they’d been getting along superbly!  James has introduced Jacob to some of his friends and now Jacob is thinking that some of his old friends really weren’t great friends in that they didn’t reciprocate the relationship as much as could be.  Jacob has three very good old friends, and a half a dozen new friends, but James really impressed him.  They will both stop by the others room just to talk and it’s more real than just discussing games.  This is very, very cool.  I guess their favored conversation is on religion.  Wow!  Good Jacob!  I love it that he is discussing his values and such with someone who can meet him intellectually, and in spirit.  I don’t think James is the type to put too much stock in church activities, but Jacob has joined a club that is spiritually orientated, though not any particular denomination.  Cool, cool.  He says that he is going on a retreat in a couple of weekends and he is looking forward to meeting people.  Hehehe even the girl-kind!  I think James is the better studier between the two, but Jacob goes to more classes.  Eh, somewhere betwixt the two they are good students!

 

Jacob wanted to try something different this time for restaurants.  He said there were a strip of them in town and so we drove through them until he got to a steak one that he said had a good reputation.  It was VERY good.  Jacob had mostaccioli and I had a steak sandwich with all the right veggies on top like onions, tomato’s and mushrooms!  The plates were heaping AND we each had dessert.  Jacob had a Sunday and I had a strawberry cheesecake!  Yayyyy for healthy appetites.  Jacob ate the entire meal without looking back. Hehehe Good Jacob! 

 

We talked about some normal areas like his roommate and classes and such.  There was some discussion on his family, most especially his Grandfather who had just recently died.  I was glad that he was talking about it.  He was too close to his grandfather not to be.  We really didn’t talk much about his brothers.  That was a little different, but certainly acceptable.  I wanted the visit to be about him and him and I.  As it turned out, there was one certain surprise. 

 

Jacob had told me about a movie he had watched in one of his psychology courses.  He said it was a psychological thriller.  As it turns out the guy that was doing all the killing was a bad alter of someone with multiple personality disorders.  Yeekks!  I guess after the movie there was a discussion about multiple personalities.  Jacob decided to confront the situation by telling his teacher and peers that his mother was a multiple.  Holy Carismo! *giggle*  I was very glad the first thing he said was that his mother had never killed anyone.  YAYYYY Jacob!

 

But, the situation and all the questions his peers asked about it caused him to ask a lot more questions of me.  They were great questions like how did I decide who was out, how did we communicate and how were decisions arrived.  I did my best in answering, however many questions were like well, I think its like ... ‘cuz somethings even I don’t know.  Like I can hear other parts ask and answer questions, and I might guess if there were a hug within reach who might try to grab it, but there’s really no sense of how all the switches are made.  I know from our friend that if he starts to scold, we usually regress in age, or if we’re in trouble like confessing we ate fried mushrooms on Friday, that usually a younger to middle aged part will appear.  With Jacob though we talked about integration, which we don’t believe in and about taking responsibility.  I told him that if one of us killed, then we should all go to jail, because together, we have to face having one life.  If one of us graduates from school, we will all receive the diploma.  Hehehe, already I can hear a younger part ask, but we can’t color on it or nuthin, right?

 

Communication is something we do a lot better with now days than we had in the past.  Thank goodness for that.  We told him some stuff too about things that have been happening.  First, we started with Anna having locked us in the bathroom at Dr. M’s for 40 minutes.  Later, when we were much deeper into the conversation, we told him about the situation a couple of weeks ago with the Sex sites and the knife.  I don’t know if I’ve gone over board or scared him, but we figured that if anyone had the right to know, it was him.  We didn’t want to threaten him, but we also had a need to tell him that not all is like an easy piece of cake.  Mostly, we told him because it was a real situation that we’re still concerned about.  I know that he is listening, but he didn’t ask too many questions about it.  I imagine it would be something that he is going to discuss with James.  James appears to be very analytical, which is a good experience for jacob.  I will follow up mid-week maybe on Tuesday or Wednesday after he’s had a chance to think things over.  I’ll just want to know if he has any questions or needs any help to figure things out.  This is the kinda thing it’s fair for us to worry over some.  I’ve spent his lifetime trying to protect him from me, it seemed the right time to be more direct.

 

Whoops kitty has joined me.  This is the one who thinks he earns a second breakfast, just because he’s still up!  Hmm, a really good petting just took care of all that.  You know what I’m thinking?  I’m thinking that Chief has been on kitty vacation all summer.  He’s been so sleepy, but now that the weather is starting to be more nice, he seems to have come out of morning hibernation.  Maybe?  It is a theory?

 

Anyway ... after Jacob and I left the restaurant ... Jacob said after about 5 time the busboy gave up on the thought we were leaving.  Think we spent about 4 ½ hours there.  Anyway, after we went to the bank because I wanted to give him a little cash AND he had a check to deposit yet from working over the summer.  I gave him a little more than we thought we would because the machine said we had to take more money than the middle amount we had figured.  It was just one of those moments where we thought we wanted to give him everything in the world.  Still happy that we did it, but I suppose I should check my account?  Oh good!  There’s still money in there with enough to take Macadam out today.  YAYYYY!  I asked Jacob and he told me how much was in his account.  He’s at about $1500.  I’m not sure though if that includes the money he owes for rent or food.  I’ll have to check that part out for sure.  I think his father will give him a couple of thousand dollars for next semester.  The money is money that is owed to Jacob for work completed over the summer.  His dad has an exterior painting business, and you can be sure Jacob was up with him before the crack of dawn!  Hehe  I needed to know if he was going to be ok.  He really needs to get this financial aid for next semester or he’s going to have problems.  He gave me a piece of paper that needs to be filled out by my university to verify that I’m a student also, and that will help him gain better financial aid.  So, I’m pretty glad to help him there.  I just have to mail something to my school. 

 

Ok, feel better now.  I sent an email to my financial aid person.  He’s out of the office until Wednesday, but his auto response left the extension of someone I can call on Monday for an address and contact person.  YAYYYY!!!

 

The last part of the visit was a little sad.  Because I had to say good-bye, but even that is nice, because I get a Jacob-hug. :) That’s a very good thing.  This time as I watched him walk away, he turned around to say “I love you.”  Shoot, if that doesn’t turn one’s heart to jelly, I don’t know what would.  Wiping away the tears again.  Shoot.  Just a big ol jellyfish, I am!

 

*Sigh* Maybe we need a little more coffee...  Break!

 

Ahh, had a little refresment too!  My friend came over and he brought amongst other things pickels and a 2-liter pop!  YAYYYYY!

 

Hehe that’s the other fun story, because indeed he was over!  I think he got here about 5:30 and stayed for about 3 hours.  He had already eaten with his son, but he brought me a small sandwich AND POTATO SALAD!!  YAYYYY!!!  My friend is an excellent person to talk to, but sometimes we tend to baby him a little.  We know when he has his worried face on ... he has too many troubles and needs to spill them out!  He’s worried about everyone ... His brother needs a job, his mother is going blind, and his daughter and her mother got together, then the daughter took up issue with her father on why he should spend $1,100 on exploratory surgery for her cat.  YEEEEEKKKS!!!  I don’t even know if he is on first name basis with the cat!  AND, it’s just one of her strays.  Boy-oy-boy, I could tell you what I would say!  I told him when I start having astronomical medical bills, to put me under!  I think if my own kitties who aren’t “walk-ins” but steady companions for over the last 7 years were to need $1,100 hundred exploratory surgery, I might need to let them die.  This may sound like a very cruel thing, but fact of the matter is I couldn’t just raise $1,100 on my own.  I bring down my financial account to nearly zero each month.  Just couldn’t do it. *Sigh* More likely though, I would go through the same thing as his daughter, I’d probably go to him too. :(

 

So, we went back to the drawing board and thought, HMMMM, what would relieve his stress?!  Hehehe, ANYWAY....

 

It was a very nice visit.  I’m left thinking of his last few moments here.  We nearly always let the Casies be to say good night.  He tucks us in, but they’ve been having a hard time letting him go.  I can still here her squeaming, “I came untucked, I came untucked!”  Umm, she can be just a little demanding!  But, alas, he is gentle and patient. :)

 

So, that is pretty much our day, except the parts already written yesterday morning.  Like I may have noted previously ... it was a wonderful, wonderful day!

 

We’re now up to the part, we are wondering if V is ever going to wake up!  It’s 4:30 am.  And by our clock, he is at least 10 minutes late!  AHA!  More Tom Foolery! *Sigh*